A 'lil HooHaa

Messing with the blogging world since 2005

life

A close call that makes you think about the big picture more

I’m not perfect when it comes to driving, that’s for sure. 

I’ve been pulled over a few times in my life. I’ve hit deer, had an accident caused by icy conditions and probably, more than a few times, avoided a serious accident by the stroke of luck. 

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve tried to be smarter with driving. I’d say *most* of the time, that works. Not always. But for the most part, I try to do things right and carefully. If my phone is used in the car, it’s speak to text or hands-free talking. Even then, I tend to try and do it as little as possible.  

It drives me nuts when I see people driving and texting and the like. And maybe I’m to a point now where I want to turn on the feature on iPhones (not sure if others have this) where if somebody texts you and you are driving, it sends a message saying you are driving.

There’s a reason for this post. And I promise it will all make sense. However, this one has the potential of being longer, so hopefully you can stay with me. 

First, at the end of April, I was pulled over on the interstate. I was ticketed for doing 80 in a 65 (note: my cruise was set for lower than 80, but I knew I was going to try and work with the court anyway and being it was 10:45 at night, I wasn’t up for an argument with a trooper). I responded to the ticket and was able to get into a driver diversion program. I took the 6-hour safe driving course online, sent in all the needed paperwork and my ticket was forgiven. It just cost me what it took to get into the program, and the cost of the course. 

Was it an expense I didn’t need? Absolutely. But, sometimes things happen for a reason. 

Ever since then, I’ve gone slower. Is it because I don’t want to deal with that again? Of course. But another part of me notes that it’s better. If you are driving, say, 70, instead of 75-78 — how much faster do you actually get somewhere. Over a two or three hour trip… 10 minutes? 15? Is it worth the aggravation? 

I say all of this because of something that happened to me this week. What happened has left me a bit shaken and though I know it will pass, it’s really been weighing heavily on my mind and deep into my thoughts. 

This past week, I was heading home from one of the districts where I work. I was taking a back road, as I normally do. For those of you in the area and know the roads, it’s on the backside of the river between Hamden and Walton. 

I’ve driven this road many times in my lifetime. Probably in the thousands. There are some hairy places on it and people don’t always pay attention to the posted speeds. There are some sharp corners and some flats where the one side drops down into the river. There are also some tight spots where getting two cars side by side can be nerve-racking. 

Walks with Harper mean a whole lot more now.

It was a rainy day, so it was wet out. That, of course, makes things slippery and would warrant slowing down. 

As I headed home, I was just moving along under the speed limit as some of the corners worry me in their own right. The one that always makes me worry is a sharp turn that, as you come from the Hamden side, curves back toward your side of the road, but down a little hill. It’s fully blind, too, so if you take it too quickly, it could end badly. There’s also a good 4- to 6-foot culvert there as well. 

On this day, I was approaching and a truck came barreling around the corner from the Hamden direction. It was a mid-size red truck with a wood bed, instead of the normal bed. That usually means it was lighter than normal. 

This person was definitely not close to the speed limit and as he hit the corner, he came over into my side. Of course when he saw me, he needed to correct himself. That caused a fishtail. When going that speed, you don’t have the control you want. I slowed and got over as far as I could. 

I can only piece together so much of what happened next. I remember most, but not all. With that in mind, when it was happening, it felt like it was in slow motion. 

The other driver came around that corner, tried to correct and started to fishtail back and forth. His whole truck was going back and forth and we missed a head-on collision by mere inches. He kept in the fishtail all the way past me and I’m still not sure how he didn’t hit me at any point. 

He tried to keep it straight and correct but he had no luck and ended up barreling into the culvert. And hitting at least one tree with the back-end of his truck. 

At that point, I had two choices: keep driving or stop. I chose to stop.

I’ve had mixed reactions as to what others would have done. Some said they would have left because, legally, they don’t have to stay. Others have said they would have stopped as well but likely wouldn’t have handled it the way I did. 

I’m actually shocked I handled it the way I did. 

I was calm with it all. I checked to make sure the guy was OK. If we needed to call anybody. There was some blood on the road and some items strewed about the culvert as his window had been open. My guess is he cracked his head during all of this. He definitely seemed a bit woozy as he tried to get his truck out of there. But I noted to him that I didn’t think he was going anywhere as his back axle look snapped. 

He said he was going to call some people to help. I went back to my vehicle. Neighbors came out. Asked if I was OK and then asked if he had been going too fast. I noted that, yes, it sure seemed like it. I am sure living on that corner, those people have seen a lot of fast cars go by. 

I went back to my car and was shaking. I decided to get back out again and check the situation. I asked again about calling. He said no he was dealing with it. The neighbors were there too. The driver noted I didn’t have to do anything as it wasn’t my fault. 

Well, no shit it wasn’t my fault. I had been going under the speed limit on my side of the road. 

I ended up leaving soon after. I did call a police officer friend and asked if I needed to stay. He said no — as long as I wasn’t involved and all, I didn’t have to do anything. So off I went. 

The thing is, I was pretty shaken up about this. I still am. All the way home, all I could think about is if I left for work a few seconds earlier. Or if I had been driving a mile or so more an hour. I’d have been closer to the actual curve and there would have been zero chance of missing a head-on collision. And at the rate of speed he was going, there was a pretty good chance I wouldn’t have reached my next birthday. Or if I did, who knows what kind of shape I would have been in. 

That night when I got home and after I ate, I went for a walk with Harper. I got a bit emotional to myself thinking about how if seconds had changed, I may not have been walking Harper that night or ever again. And for the past several days, these things have crossed my mind as well. 

It’s now been about five days or so since this happened. I’m better, but still a bit shook up about it. I’m sure time will continue to help this. I’ve heard who the person was and some other info, but what’s done is done. That doesn’t even matter to me. A day or two after this happened, I talked to one of the school social workers – somebody I’ve known for probably 30 years. She gave me some good thoughts on how to kind of get my stress down and how to ease through this. So I’m working on things a bit. 

I’m also avoiding that back road for probably a long time. I’ve seen and had a few other close calls on that road (not this close though). People go at a higher rate of speed, and there’s a few other corners that can make you anxious. 

The reality is, I know this was a massive close call. How close, I don’t know. But I don’t think it would have ended well for me if we had gone head on, that’s for sure. 

I’m going to end this post with some other thoughts. I’m not perfect and I’ve had some distracted driving. But it seems like it’s getting crazier. People don’t slow down or stop when people are in crosswalks, and you can see they are doing other things. I’m not sure how many times over the past month where somebody has started to come over into my lane because they are obviously looking down and on their phone. Or how many times people have passed in illegal areas, cut corners at high rates and all sorts of other things. 

Slow down. Enjoy the trip a little. Give yourself the time. Learn and change things up before it’s too late. 

Life is short already. Don’t make it even shorter with stupid decisions. 

Feel free to leave a comment, or e-mail P.J. at hoohaablog@gmail.com. Also, please “Like” A ‘lil HooHaa on Facebook!

Looking at life a little differently

I’ve always said birthdays are just another day … and your age is just a number. 

And I still truly believe that. 

However, as we start to get older, I think you start to see things with a different set of eyes. As I approach a half of a century on this Earth (still a couple of years, but much closer to that than, say, a quarter of a century), I tend to look at things in a bit of a different light. 

Mainly, about myself. 

I’ve made certain choices in life that have brought me to where I am. And I’m OK with that. I realize if I had gone this direction or that direction, things would be totally different. Maybe for the better. Maybe for the worse. You never know as there are always ramifications for a decision you make. 

Sometimes, though, you just have to start understanding where things are in this world. 

Find the things that make you smile. Sunrise in Avalon, NJ – October 2021.

I’ve had a lot of time recently to do some thinking. And I’ve kind of been in a frame of mind where I don’t know how to express things. My world is upside down, and there’s not a lot to lean on. As I learn new things (ie: owning a puppy), I often feel isolated or on an island. But what makes it harder is not having that regular system to lean into, and that has nothing to do with the dog. 

Too, I realize as we grow older, everybody has different priorities. And I never will fault people for priorities. In fact, it’s how it should be. My decisions in life have put me where I am. I have a pretty good job. I’m in the process of buying a house. I now have a dog. But, I’m also single and don’t have kids – and that’s by choice. I often work too much and when I’m not working, half the time I just want to chill. 

But, you also need to have interactions and connections as part of life, right?

The thing to always remember is we all grow – and in different ways. Some get married. Some have kids. Some move away for a job. Some just go in different directions. Some live care free lives where they just go from place to place. Maybe you stopped doing something where you saw a lot of people (ie: for me, when I stopped playing softball, I saw less of those people). And it’s not done out of spite or with bad intentions, rather it is just a change. 

I’m one of those people who tend to hang on with certain things. I like giving people the benefit of the doubt, and I try my hardest to reach out and things like that. Alas, I’m not perfect. It doesn’t always happen, as much as I would like to do so. And this isn’t anything in particular, rather a situation where people just have other things going on and other commitments. While it’s true that some people just aren’t reliable and constantly go back on what they tell you or just always spin the yarn, the reality is most people just have life and family and things come up. I get that. 

So that leads to me. 

Here I am, approaching that half-century mark. I don’t plan on making any big moves in my world, so I’m where I’m at. I like to travel a little bit. I like baseball. And I like experiencing things. I just have to realize that many things I will do may have to be done by myself or, eventually, with my dog (such as possibly learning to like “camping” a bit more and traveling to national and state parks). 

I have to become more secure in this. 

The reality is, sometimes people don’t always come through when they tell you they will. And I’m not talking about one or two times. I mean, things come up. We all have had to back out of things here and there. You move on and deal. I’m talking more about the continual way of doing this. Over and over. 

It’s interesting. On my birthday, I read something on Facebook. It quoted Anthony Hopkins. It was pretty long, but well worth reading … in the end, it talked about people. Basically, what I got from it, is that things should always be a two-way street. If you are trying too hard and you seem to be the only one doing so, it might not be time to look deeper into things. It really struck a chord with me, though.

Life’s hard. The experiences and the people who you let into your circle are what will make you happy. You have to go out and get it. I know I’m not always happy. I know getting this dog has actually, for now, made me more down (I realize in time that will change) because of everything I have to do. 

Life is what you make of it. I always have said that … the difference now is I have to start living it, too. 

Look ahead, not behind. And do everything you can to smile as much as you possibly can as you never know when that smile will stop.

Feel free to leave a comment, or e-mail P.J. at hoohaablog@gmail.com. Also, please “Like” A ‘lil HooHaa on Facebook! You can also follow me on Twitter @softball29!

On the Trail: Lake Louise/Banff Gondola

As I try to get back into regular blogging (again) and work on some of these features, it’s time to dial back the clock nearly a year for this one. 

It’s crazy to think this trip to the Pacific Northwest and Canada was nearly a year ago. When getting on a plane didn’t require masks and worry. When the ability to go to places didn’t require six feet of separation. It’s nice to remember these things and hope they will get back there. 

This trip was a geocaching-based one and got bigger as it was planned. We covered a lot of miles and saw a lot, but one thing was getting to Banff and Banff National Park, even just for a day. I’d like to go back some day when I can spend more time there, that’s for sure. 

On this day, we hit two places – Lake Louise, and then the Banff Gondola. I’ll put the two of these together as they were on the same day. Be sure though – they are highly different. 

Lake Louise

First, by the time we reached Lake Louise, it was too late to get parking, so we had to get a shuttle. And that took forever, it seemed. We waited for one at the wrong spot and if we had just driven back up to one area, we would have been there much quicker. Alas, live and learn when you don’t know the area. 

But, we did arrive. And we explored. Though we didn’t go hiking up, we took the trail around the lake for a bit. It’s a striking area, that’s for sure. The Lake Louise “hike” was a bit more than four miles, but if you had time, there are many more miles to explore. And it seems quite a bit of different terrain, too.

Remember, though, that the Banff area is very touristy. And with that brings a lot of people. I think to visit a spot like Lake Louise would mean getting there very early, spend your time there and then try to get out of there by 12 or 1 p.m., and then go visit some areas that might not be as crowded. 

Lake Louise itself, though, is striking. The color of the water and the wandering trail that takes you around the outside of it is wonderful. There are also a few geocaches, which is cool. It’s truly amazing to see what kind of things nature can give you. 

And photo opportunities? Plenty! There’s no chance you could leave here and claim you didn’t have anything to take photos of, that;’s for sure. But don’t just focus on the photos, focus on the beauty. 

The great part about this trail was all of the different people. Because it’s not the most strenuous stroll you will take, there were people of all shapes and sizes. It’s nice when you can get that in a place like this because it allows everybody to enjoy the scenery and brilliance. 

Banff Gondola

This was a definite on the list to hit. The gondola ride up was a blast. And there weren’t many people when we got there.

Remember, we went in the fall, and later in the day. That’s a check mark to each item as that meant fewer people. When on top of the mountain, there are a series of “trails” that take you to different parts and viewpoints. While

I might not consider this a trail, per say, it’s nice to know when you get to the top of the gondola ride, it’s not just one viewpoint and back down you go. Instead, you can go find a bunch of different places and there’s also (of course) a gift shop at the top as well. 

We didn’t have issues parking here, but I could see where it could be tougher during tourist season. Either way, it’s worth coming to and experiencing this. 

When done, I would encourage you to jump down into Banff and explore a bit. We only got to do so for an hour or two (including dinner), but what a cool town. This is definitely a place I want to visit again – preferably in the spring or fall when there are fewer people. 

Final thoughts: 

Positives: Lake Louise is an amazing and relatively easy hike. If we had more time, I think we would have tried some of the other trails and maybe looked to see where things led. The Banff Gondola is a great experience and spending time at the top of the mountain is really wild. A lot of fun. 

Cons: Parking at Lake Louise. Do the research. Either get there really early, or know where the best place for the shuttles is. The gondola has a price tag, so make sure you know that ahead of time and make a reservation if possible. 

Overall: Both are well worth the time. Lake Louise is breathtaking. There are some great spots to stop and soak it in. I have no doubt if you explore the other trails, the views will be simply amazing as well. The gondola “trails” give you some awesome looks and make you appreciate where you are. Make no mistake – if you go to places like this, appreciate what you see. If you ever get the chance to visit the Banff area, spend more time there than I did. I really want to go back one day … it’s truly an amazing place. 

To watch a Relive video of this hike, please see below!

Feel free to leave a comment, or e-mail P.J. at hoohaablog@gmail.com. Also, please “Like” A ‘lil HooHaa on Facebook! You can also follow me on Twitter @softball29!

The reality of life today

This year is a blur.

I mean, I’m sure most of us are happy that 2020 is already in its eighth month. And goodness knows we are all *hoping* 2021 will be better. 

It has to be, right?

The past five or six months have been a total blur. They’ve been some of the longest and toughest hours I’ve ever had professionally. Don’t get me wrong – I’m happy to have a job. I’ve been where millions of Americans currently are and I know how stressful and tough it can be. I feel for them and hope they’ll find work sooner rather than later. 

Stress since March comes in many different packages, though. 

For those on the front line (medical etc.), it’s been crazy. Having to deal with so much illness and death. For those who have had to work through this whole thing (raises hand), be it in a supermarket, or some other job considered essential. And those who were left in charge of trying to help their kids get through the end of the school year without messing up any sort of a learning process. Or having to find a way to do it and hold down a job. 

Then there’s the having to stay inside, or wear masks, or wash your hands more in a day then maybe you had in weeks before. Or hoping to find toilet paper (and other paper products) or hand sanitizer. 

I’m missing a lot here, I know. But if you think about the past 5-6 months, we’ve faced so many things. And that doesn’t even include the political or social justice side of things, which has put so many people on edge or ready to yell and scream at others. 

It’s all a blur. 

My head hurts from it all. I’ve been working in the office for a lot of this pandemic. Some days there was hardly anybody else in the building. Other times, a handful. Recently, there’s more. When I did work at home early on, it was hard. Concentration was very hard, and focus was tough. I came into the office because I could get things done. That, of course, added more though as I had this or that to help with. 

My body of professional work was actually kind of impressive. From ideas I had, to the executing of many massive projects, I am quite proud of things. 

But my mental health took a beating. And though I know depression and things like that are real, I’ve never really dealt with it. I still don’t think I have, but I definitely had some mental health battles over the past several months – and believe me, I know I’m not the only one. 

Flower photography has helped at times. Nature remains beautiful during a pandemic.

Though part of me in recent years has tended to be way more of an introvert, I still like some human contact outside of work. And doing Zoom meetups and things just don’t do it for me. Simple things weren’t possible, and that made it hard. I walked a bit more. I tried to be outside. I take a lot of photos of flowers and things like that. I listened to many podcasts. I played around online and dealt with virtual settings and games and things to try and up the entertainment value. I watched things on Netflix. 

It didn’t make it easier. 

It’s August now. 

I haven’t seen a baseball game in person this year, and I know I won’t. That’s hard for me. Baseball is a huge part of my summer, be it going by myself, with friends, or family. I love the ambiance and the sounds and the sights. I usually go on a baseball trip or three and those were canceled early in this, knowing we’d likely not be doing it. 

I had tentatively planned to work on a trip to Iceland in late September. That won’t happen. Though I’ve saved a bit more toward next September – hopefully. 

A couple of us had talked about maybe the UK in November or December to see Genesis on their reunion tour … they’ve postponed that until next year … so maybe. 

It’s still all a blur. 

You’d think I’d have blogged more with as much screen time as I’ve seemingly had. But the drive isn’t there. I stare and can’t get the words to flow. My eyes and head hurt. I am on a computer too much. Often, I’ll sit at night with my laptop on my lap and stare at the TV. Talk about a zombie at times. 

I’ve wanted to really start rolling creatively. I’ve worked on a bullet journal. Some pen pal items. Postcards. And I often stop and stare. I can’t get the creative juices flowing. I watch YouTube videos and surf groups and social media for inspiration. There’s a lot of talented people out there and I still can’t get the drive. 

I realize, too, I’m not the only one in this position. I’m lucky in that New York is one of the few states that has really improved with all of the COVID items. It’s kind of under control, to a point, and things are slowly allowing you to feel “somewhat” normal. No, you can’t do things you did before this or the same way. But we’re “under control” for a reason and we don’t need to screw that up. 

Other states are currently where New York was at the beginning of this. And that hurts everybody as it’s the warm months and people like to travel, even if they maybe shouldn’t. There’s no middle ground. 

So, we continue. 

I’m not sure if life will ever be normal again. The things we took heavily for granted might be things of the past. Businesses have closed and may never come back. Wearing a mask in some situations is almost becoming second nature. I’m curious how my job will be this fall as I expect I’ll be wearing masks more often and have no choice in it. That’s fine, too, I want us to be safe and smart so hopefully 2021 will be better than 2020. 

It’s incredible that it’s been so many months since this whole thing started. And yet, we’re not at the end yet. I once had a lot of optimism and hope. Now, I try and avoid the news and just hope eventually some positive news comes out with everything going on. 

The blur hasn’t changed, but I hope things eventually come back into focus.

Feel free to leave a comment, or e-mail P.J. at hoohaablog@gmail.com. Also, please “Like” A ‘lil HooHaa on Facebook! You can also follow me on Twitter @softball29!

The world as we know it …

Does anybody else feel like they are living in a reality movie?

This is like The Truman Show, times a million.

A few months ago, we all heard about this COVID-19 coronavirus. It was pretty spooky, but it was far away. Though it didn’t seem those in charge were too worried about what it could become.

But, now it’s here. And it’s downright scary.

Now, let me preface this by saying I think the widespread panic is a bit crazy. We’re in a panic stage, which is never good. If we all use extreme caution, don’t put ourselves in bad spots, and use common sense, I think we’ll be fine in the long run. We can’t go bonkers.

But you have to be smart.

Hoarding toilet paper or hand sanitizer, and then trying to mark it up to ridiculous amounts of money doesn’t help. Not one bit. People need to be able to get basic supplies. Stocking your freezer with enough meat to last two years doesn’t help anybody.

It honestly makes me wonder about society as a whole.

This is a crazy illness going around. Things are being shut down. Businesses are closing — and many likely can’t afford it. People are alarmed and in a panic — and that definitely doesn’t help. We’re in uncharted waters here.

I work in two school districts, handling PR. That includes maintaining social media and websites at each. Each are putting out information as fast as possible. Most people have been thankful and appreciate how much each district is attempting to do for their communities. Some are negative and it makes me wonder about things. This is new for the schools, as well. Usually, they aren’t told to shut down to students for this long — especially now in the day of social media.

Speaking of that, the media and social media are hard to watch and look at. A human’s mind can’t grasp everything that is going on and process it that well. It’s impossible. Rumors become “truth,” and and the truth and facts gets questioned by people because they don’t want to believe it.

We have to practice self care. For me, it’s trying to process things and remain calm through it all. That doesn’t always happen. I’m a human just like anybody else. Despite thinking this reaction could be way over, I understand it. And I have fears and caution just like anybody else. What we’re doing is being done for a reason. Yes, it will inconvenience people. Yes, people will suffer. But in the end, we will get through it.

One way or another.

So practice some self care. Go for a walk and try and avoid close contact with people. Get some sun. Show social distance. Try not to feed into the hysteria and breathe. Play a game. Video chat with an old friend.

And if looking to help small businesses, see if you can buy gift cards. Or go get some takeout.

We will get through this. It might be faster than they thing; or it might be longer. But we will get through it.

Most of all, be good to one another. Basic human kindness or a smile from six feet away can go a long way.

Feel free to leave a comment, or e-mail P.J. at hoohaablog@gmail.com. Also, please “Like” A ‘lil HooHaa on Facebook! You can also follow me on Twitter @softball29!