A 'lil HooHaa

Messing with the blogging world since 2005

mental health

Living life happy: Thoughts on health (physical and mental) and finding peace

My normal style when I write is to go a traditional route. I write the beginning and then the bulk, and then finish up. 

Rinse, repeat. 

But this beginning I’ve re-written multiple times. And some of the bulk, too. This post has taken multiple shapes before arriving at the current version. 

And it’s a bit lengthy. But that’s OK… as I had a lot to get out. So hopefully you can hang with me throughout. 

It’s been a hot minute since I’ve truly blogged, outside of the monthly photo challenge. And while I usually enjoy said challenge, I miss the aspect of blogging and putting thoughts and other things out there. It allows me to put things into perspective and often see things from a different lens. 

Also, reality is, it’s sometimes good to hold yourself accountable a bit and put your own thoughts and such out there. Especially when you blog!

LIFE

Here’s a bit more reality – I’m not getting any younger. That is a reality that hits every single day. Whether it’s creaks and aches, or just how tiring a regular day (if there is a such thing) can be. 

For those of you in and around my age – give or take – do you remember being in your early 20s? 

I do.

How many nights would you spend horse-assing around with friends, work during the day, booze it up a few nights a week, and then do it all over the next day? I know I took chances and unnecessary risks and sometimes I wonder how I made it this far. 

You need to smile more in life … as we get older, there’s a lot of crap that gives stress. So smile as much as you can!

Yet, I’m not sure I would trade it for anything. 

Honestly, I wasn’t even that crazy. Among many of the friends I ran with, I was probably the safe one (depending on the crowd). Whether it was back roading and just having fun (remember, no internet – we actually used CBs!) to hanging out at the bar, we live life a bit. 

In fact, I know many people who did things way worse than I did and are still kicking. Hell, some of them are probably still as crazy (or worse) than they once were!

But this is also where reality comes into play. Some of those people I ran with are gone. Some never made 50. Others might still be with us and not in the best of places. 

That’s life. For good or bad, it’s how things are. 

While I had a lot of plans for this post, I’ve decided to dial it back just a little bit and I’m going to base this mainly on health – physical and mental. While a lot of things can be part of this, I’m going to talk about my path and how I’ve gotten there. 

I’m going to break this up as I go because there’s a lot when it comes to talking about health.  But one thing is for sure – I am truly happy that I have good health insurance as I am utilizing it to make sure I take care of myself – physically and mentally. With the way this world is, one needs to make sure they take care of themselves. Make sure you breathe and see what will benefit you. Do whatever you feel you have to do to make you feel whole. 

It’s not an easy task. I’ll get to the harder side of that, at least in my eyes, in a moment. First, the “easy” part – the physical aspect. 

PHYSICAL HEALTH

Living with Diabetes

Goodness has a lot happened since the last time I wrote about living with diabetes. If you’ve read my blog, you know I’m a Type-2 diabetic. 

At times, I control it well. Other times, not so much. 

But, since I’ve last blogged about this, a lot has changed. I *finally* accepted that no matter what I did, I would trip at times. And that made my numbers go all over. That meant finally realizing that insulin wasn’t a bad thing. In fact, it was there to help me. And I don’t take a large quantity of it, but it has helped and I’ve learned to adjust the dosage if necessary. 

Still, how did I get there?

Living with Diabetes logo

My A1C has been all over the place for the past several years. For those who don’t know, your A1C is your long-term blood sugar readings. A few times over the past few years, I’ve gone beyond 10. That’s not good. I know this yet I have not always been good with things. It’s a vicious cycle. I work and work, but then feel like I can’t get ahead. Then I stress eat or I just end up not caring. 

Again, not good.

For a while, my primary physician had been trying to talk me into insulin. But I kept pushing back. And why? Because I thought by taking insulin, I was a failure. You heard that right – in my mind, I was failing if I took something that would actually help me. 

Because hey, I had been doing so well without it. 

So I did research. I learned about insulin. I asked him questions through email. I finally accepted that this wasn’t a failure… far from it. In fact, it was something that would help me. I don’t want to lose digits or limbs later in life. So I need to be smarter about things. 

It just happened to be the next step. And so, I went on insulin. And with that, things started to improve. 

Go figure. 

It also allowed me to get off Ozempic, which was awful for me. It played games with my digestive life, and despite having great insurance, it was so expensive. I’m one who would actually rather insurance money go to something I feel actually helps me. 

I then figured out insulin wasn’t a failure, rather a success. That’s a change of thinking, eh? It’s just a step in life to help me manage things and make sure I’m not slowly killing myself. And what happened? Well … my numbers and readings started to go down. 

So much so that my last blood work came with a 7.1 A1C reading. For me, that’s huge. The last time I was that low was September 2021. 

That’s a long time. 

Since 2021, I’ve had my numbers reach double digits multiple times. And here’s the thing, when you are battling something like this and don’t see immediate results (welcome to this day and age) it’s hard. And then when you don’t see results in a week or two, it becomes depressing. That’s where stress eating comes in. Or you stop checking your blood (see no evil, hear no evil!), which obviously isn’t a good thing. Next thing you know, your A1C is out of whack. 

So things are going OK there. And it’s funny when your blood sugars are decently controlled – you have more energy and a better outlook. Go figure. 

My A1C will likely bump up a little net time for a few reasons. But I’m still working on things and I’ll keep pushing. 

Shoulder time

Many years ago, I played in a softball league that used to start games in mid-April. Anybody who has lived in central (and upstate) New York knows that the weather can change quickly in the spring. Anyway, had a game under the lights and was told I needed to catch. No problem. First inning, we go through warmups and I go to throw the ball down to second and … it felt like my arm went with it. 

Ouchies. 

It didn’t help that I didn’t really warm up. I mean, hell, I couldn’t have been more than 21-22 years old. Who, at that age, worries about these types of things. I should have. Since this happened, my arm hasn’t been the same. I learned to live with the sometimes pain of it. Alas, over the last year or so, it got worse. Sleeping on it was painful. Throwing the ball for the dog was tough. I’d had enough. 

So I mentioned it to my primary. 

I got into Ortho. I got a cortisone shot (which sent my blood readings way up for a couple of weeks). And I started going to physical therapy. And, as I am writing this, my arm feels better than it has in 20+ years. There’s still work to go, but I feel as though I’m on the right track. I have at least one more PT session (maybe a couple) and another visit with ortho to see if anything is next. One thing my doctor offered was some test with neuro to see if it’s something like that – but if it’s not needed, I will cancel that. I’ve been told it can be a painful procedure. 

Pain isn’t fun, that’s for sure. 

This has helped me in different parts of my life as I feel like I can do more without having to protect the shoulder. It will still take a bunch more time, I’m sure. But I’m on the right path. 

Other aspects

Add to all of this but about a year ago, I started going back to seeing a chiropractor once a month, Just for some maintenance. The one I go to not only accepts insurance, but has built a trust. I’m skittish with certain things that chiropractors do, but with him it feels safe, secure, and no issues. This is important, too, as it’s a nice way to make sure your back and such are in sync with the rest of your body. 

I definitely walk a lot, too. Blame (or credit) Harper for that, but no matter the weather, we get our two or three walks a day in. 

And while I’d love to get my heart rate up a bit more, I’m not against just walking with her and letting her explore. After all, it’s one of life’s great joys to have an amazing dog. 

Next up is truly trying to figure to drop some more weight. Over the past 3-5 years, I’ve dropped a bunch. It’s been a slow road, though. And that’s OK as it’s pretty much stayed off. Still, I need to find ways to get more off. 

MENTAL HEALTH

Being real with myself

This section is going to be a little tough. And it might be a little raw at times. While I don’t consider myself a threat with any self-harm or anything, the reality is I’ve been in some low places. I battle – and that’s fine. But you can’t always do it alone. 

Getting help isn’t a bad thing. But until you come to terms with that, it does look like a weakness or, again, a failure. 

This part of my own health is probably the more important part of my current health journey. After all, if you can’t function daily because of stress, anxiety or anything else, what can you do?

If you had asked me 10 or 15 years ago about going to therapy, I would have laughed it off. Honestly, 15 years ago, I’d have never been able to afford it. My absolute issue was thinking of therapy the way society portrayed it – go lay on a couch and somebody asks you about your childhood. 

Therapy has come a long way. 

I know multiple people who have gone to therapy and speak highly of it. I know others who said it didn’t work for them. 

I was torn. I didn’t know if I honestly wanted it. There is still a stigma attached to it and I tend to avoid things like that. And that’s probably because I don;’t shy away from things – if I do something and it’s helping, I will talk about it with others. So that stigma makes one think, 

Part of that was scary. If I went to therapy and it worked, does that mean I’m broken? That something is wrong with me? 

Not going to lie: part of going to therapy was to make sure I’m in good spirits around this one. And how couldn’t you be?

Far from it. After all, have you seen what this world is like? 

At some point, I got curious. So I started looking around locally. I didn’t want to have to travel too far, but I also wanted certain things from a therapist if I took this step. 

I started looking around. I found some different practices, but one drew my eye. I’m not sure why. It could have just been the way she described her practice etc. And, honestly, it may have been because as I read, I felt I wouldn’t be her normal sort of client. I still didn’t do anything. 

However … 

I’m one of those guys who has a ton of tabs open and I don’t always shut down my web browser. So … that tab honestly sat there for months. I’d shut things down my computer sometimes, and then all my tabs opened back up. And every once in a while. I’d come across the website, read it again and then slide away. Months went by and I finally decided to look deeper. I did a Google search to learn a little more and one site noted she wasn’t accepting new clients. 

Well, shit. 

At this point I actually felt ready. I didn’t care about any stigmas or anything. So, I said hell with it and reached out anyway. To start things off, there was a free phone consultation. I liked that because it seemed like a good way to feel out if I felt this was for me or not. I sent a quick email and kept it short and to the point: 

“If any info is needed — the basis of this is anxiousness, trying to feel more fulfilled, organizational, and just the ability (or lack thereof) of being able to disconnect and appreciate things more. Just taking this step is a big deal in my own mind, so hopefully this is the right one!”

And it’s absolutely true – me just reaching out was a massive step forward for me. It went from seeing this person’s website to actually taking a step forward. And based on that, we had a consultation. And then we chatted. And I filled out a questionnaire. And, it seems, I said the right things. I set up an appointment and I took a step I never thought I would take. 

I actually felt a lot of vulnerability. And not in a bad way – but in a way that was allowing my mind to accept that everything wasn’t perfect and that I couldn’t fix everything just by existing. 

A lot of times I truly thought I could do that. 

Here’s a secret – it didn’t work. 

I had to accept that everything wasn’t perfect. I don’t want to say I hit “rock bottom,” but it’s the best way to explain it. I needed to come to the conclusion that I had to find a way to get help to fix things. 

So I asked. 

Let’s be clear, though. There are different levels of getting help. I feel I’m on the lower end of things. To me, it wasn’t life or death. To me, it was a way to find out different aspects of me and to find fulfillment. And I realize, too, this isn’t an overnight thing. It will require some time and some maintenance. And that;s OK. 

But as I read about many other people and therapy, I realize I’m actually quite lucky. Sure, reaching out and getting some help is a big step and one I needed to do, but I also realize that so many others have it worse. Where therapy is a lifeline. And maybe me finally taking this step and taking care of myself will help me avoid anything major happening. 

And things happen for a reason, right? 

This therapist checked all the boxes for me – I didn’t want a male perspective, I wanted a female perspective; she took insurance (score!), and it was a more modern approach. Apparently some of the things I wrote out in the initial questionnaire resonated, too, as becoming a client worked out. I’ve been a handful of times since I initially went and I find it’s helped. I’ve found some clarity in life and a different viewpoint/outlook on certain things. It’s also made me realize life isn’t so bad. 

There’s a lot of shit in this world. And you add every aspect where stimulation can come from – work, relationships, a million streaming services or channels, the political atmosphere, social media, sports, finances … should I go on? You add every bit of that together and the human mind and body gets taxed. A lot. And I’m not talking about money. 

Before all of this, I would get highly anxious, stressed out, angry, or all sorts of other feelings. I’d be exhausted during a regular day. I would have a hard time concentrating and focusing on things that needed to be done. I would dive a little too hard into work and not so much into my personal world. 

That’s not really a way to live. 

And since I’ve started, all of that has improved. Vastly. 

The sessions I’ve had have been informative and a way for me to express myself. And it’s funny, too, as I’m not ashamed or embarrassed about going – even though I thought I would feel it. 

Timing, too, can be a major player. If I had done this 3-4 months ago, or longer, would I have felt the same way? Or, was the timing key when I made the initial contact?

It’s OK to take care of yourself. It’s not a bad thing to do things like this if it helps you live a better life. These are facts. You don’t need to fit into some stereotype because society says one thing or another. Be you. And take care of you. 

THE HARPER EFFECT 

I can’t talk about mental or physical health without talking about Harper. And though I thought I was going to go even longer, this post has already gotten super long … so I’ll tackle other things in a future post. 

Harper is a massive part of my upswing in things. It doesn’t really matter what kind of day I have, when I get home and see her things change. 

They truly do. 

She’s pretty amazing to have in my world.

We walk multiple times a day. We hang out with one another. She’s my rock. And she really also seems to know when I just need her to be with me. And even times when maybe I don’t need it! 

But, she’s my companion. We travel with one another. We hike and walk and go to different places. We go to baseball games and whatever else we can find. I skip a lot of things that aren’t dog friendly because I hate leaving her behind and I won’t leave her in the car for more than a few minutes usually (if I need to quickly run into the store etc). 

But I’d be lying if I said sometimes it’s hard. There are times I just want to do nothing, but I have to walk her or whatever else. And in the end, it’s usually a good thing. 

Remember the thing I said earlier about timing? 

Same goes here. 

I got Harper when I was ready for a dog. If I had gotten her a few years earlier, it might have been different. But I got her when I needed her most and it’s been a super blessing. 

This weekend, we embark on a road trip together as we head to GeoWoodstock. I’m anxious about parts of it with Harper, but excited at the same time. Though I’ve been to a handful of GeoWoodstocks – the largest geocaching events in North America – this will be the first with Harper. I know it will probably be a weekend of eating on the run or whatever, but I’m OK with that. The beauty of the weekend will be that it’s with her. Where we can go, we will. Where we can’t, we won’t. And that’s all good. We will handle this weekend together, as we always do. 

FINDING PEACE

I am sure I have a lot more to say about different things. This post got extremely long without me touching on some other subjects, which I plan to do in the future. My goal with this post was to let me kind of put some thoughts in order and, honestly, try and show to others who might look at things the way I once did, that taking control or getting help isn’t a bad thing. 

It’s a really good thing. 

Life is hard right now for many people. And the reason can vary for people – finances, relationships, work, personal life, political spectrum, health, family, friends and the list can go on. All of these items can be good for you or bad – and you never know what might be beating somebody else down. 

I’ve simplified a lot of things. I have some projects I want to work on that will make personal spaces better. I enjoy being outside and cooking on my Blackstone. I enjoy music much more than I have for a few years.

And it’s allowed me to find some peace in life. My zen, if you will.

I know this much, I’m moving in the right direction and I feel better in most aspects of my life than I have in a long time. I’m in a much better place.

That’s a start. And a big one. And one I’m happy and proud about. 

So I’ll end here … and if you’re still with me, thank you. I appreciate you reading and allowing me to take up a little of your time. I’ll now sign off with how Jerry Springer used to end his crazy shows – until next time, take care of yourself, and each other. 

Side note: I realized I tackled some topics back in January with this post, but this is by far way more in-depth about certain aspects.

Feel free to leave a comment, or e-mail P.J. at hoohaablog@gmail.com. Also, please “Like” A ‘lil HooHaa on Facebook!

On health: Mental, physical, and otherwise

For the record, this post is one I started writing a few months ago. I need to update as I go through this and get it current, but a lot of this is still highly valid. And it’s something I had worked on, so I wanted to make sure it was published.

Living with Diabetes logo

When I started this, I was still about a month out from my most recent doctor’s appointment. I knew my blood work wasn’t going to be the best, but I was working to make sure it was better. My appointment got canceled, and I rescheduled for soon after (got lucky there). And I might tackle some of that here, but I have a more in-depth post being worked on for that. 

The reality is I truly think I hit rock bottom with the blood sugars. And though I have thought that before, this time I truly think I bottomed out. And, in the end, hopefully that’s a good thing. All of this is on me. I have often said that I know I need to do A and B, but then I end up just doing C and D. 

And that’s not good. It’s time to change things up. 

Looking at the big picture

It’s understandable that people’s mental health may not be what they want to be. And while I try not to get political with my posts – I want to talk about something in a broad sense. The political spectrum since around 2015 has been crazy – on both sides. Candidates are more polarizing, more in your face and, depending on which party you are part of, see the other side as scary. It doesn’t matter who you support – the other side no longer says “hey let’s chat,” instead it’s “evil.”

Social media and the 24-hour news media cycle plays a healthy part in that. 

And, again, I don’t care which side you support – this is true on both sides. There’s an “extreme” version on both sides, and there’s a more middle to each side. But the “wings” tend to be louder and push things more. 

Unplugging is a way to find some balance. And what better way than to get outside and explore.

Social media, again, is a huge part of that. 

So what happens with all of this? Stress builds up. Worry builds up. Anxiety builds up. You see people in a different light than you once did. People end decades-long friendships; family members fight one another; neighbors look at one another differently; towns, cities, states, and countries divide; and there’s no longer a sense of … doing what’s right for the people. 

The reality is – we can’t control a lot of these things. The only thing we can do is work on ourselves and try to survive living in this world the best we can.

If you think it’s just politics, though, you’re crazy. 

As much as we may want to blame presidents or those in congress for certain things – they really don’t control a lot of things, such as gas prices. The corporate world is fully behind prices and everything else. Otherwise try and explain to me why gas in my area is about 3.39 per gallon. Go an hour away – and not off a major highway – and you can get it for 2.85 (ish). Go 10 minutes down the road from my town and it’s 3.25ish, or on Sundays, it’s less than $3.. 

That has nothing to do with where the delivery is coming from. 

Again, we can only control so much. The biggest thing we can control is ourselves and protect our own mental and physical health the best we can. 

I can say I haven’t done the best with that, but hopefully that can change. 

So, what’s going on? 

First, my blood sugars aren’t the best. My A1C from two times ago went down a tick, and then this last time in December took a noticeable and good drop. It’s still not where it should be. But it’s getting there. I am focusing a lot more on all aspects of health for myself and results have been good so far. 

Physically, I’ve maintained about the same weight as I’ve been for a bit, and it’s actually gone down a little. However, there’s definitely some inches coming off. Over about a 3-4 month span in 2024, I had put a little back on and I had been getting a little lazy about things. I was still stress snacking. I tried to limit it, but at times, it was hard. Since November, I’ve gotten immensely better with it. 

But, reality, the daily grind can tire you out. I don’t always push myself with walks with Harper etc. I need to do more of that and get out with her and explore more. Sometimes, weekends are just sloth-like times where I get a walk or so in and then just kind of veg. While I do believe those types of days are needed at times – especially for your mental side – it’s also not good to always have them. 

Get outside more. Take a breath. Find balance.

I have changed that a bit since 2025 started and I notice that I feel better. 

On the mental health side of things, I was stretched pretty thin toward the end of 2024.

I was exhausted mentally most of the time and was burning the candle at both ends when it came to work. I’m sure, like many people, the expectations surrounding what I do are often higher than they should be (pay grade!), and not sustainable. The balance there is very tough and I’m always trying to find a way to do so while still maintaining the level I have always strived to have. Sometimes it’s hard in my job, too, as you have multiple bosses, but also ones you don’t always see or hear from. Sometimes those lines of communication are tougher and you feel like you’re out on an island when it comes to certain things. 

I’m still new to exploring my own mental health and trying to understand what helps and what doesn’t. When you take everything into account – finances, health, personal growth, relationships of all types, professional life, and everything else – it’s so much for the human mind to absorb. You add in the constant flow of social media, media, and other screen time things, and it’s overwhelming. 

Heavily overwhelming. 

I often feel like I am in a bubble of sorts and you can’t get out. I often see things and it’s almost like a blank stare. I sometimes pass people when I walk and don’t even realize they are there. I miss a lot of the little things and that’s tough, too. I often pass by neighbors or others and I’m just in a daze, barely acknowledging somebody. 

I could be fully wrong, but that just seems like a sign of being overwhelmed with life. 

Is that any way to live?

What to do?

I’ve been trying to grasp things over the past few months. The reality is that I’m now 51 and some things aren’t as easy as they once were. At the same time, I also don’t want to cut out things I enjoy, so moderation is going to be key. 

I have a bit of a plan I hope to follow and we’ll see if it works. Here’s a bit of a glimpse of what I hope to do. 

Blood monitoring

Honestly, until mid-November, I had been fully shitty about this.. When I got up in the morning, I always forgot to check my blood before my walk. Then it doesn’t hit me that I didn’t until I’m midway through breakfast. Then I lose my head and just forget. I know one thing that needs to be done is get back into the routine of things. 

I also know that there are the ones that can be worn and are continuous. I’ve tried those before. They don’t work well for me because I end up bumping into something or forgetting it’s on and when I get out of the shower go over it too hard and they fall out. And once they are out, it’s done. I do have a sample one that I’d like to try soon and see if I can do it better, but I know how I am!

Anyway, I have multiple of the readers I use. It’s nice because it connects to my phone and to an app I really like – MySugr. And as long as I use this brand, I get the VIP part of the app free. I purchased a second lancet device, which allows me to keep one reader upstairs as a reminder to check.  My hope is that it will remind me to check at a couple of important times – the morning and at night before bed (so far, so good). The other I will carry with me during the day and check at different times. If I start doing this more, hopefully I can see any trends or anything like that to help. 

I can’t stress enough that this is one of the most important things I need to start doing again. While eating smart and exercising is huge, this is the aspect that will allow me to see how my blood sugar reacts to certain things. I won’t know if things go up or down if I am not watching this. So far, so good. I’ve been doing well with it and will hopefully keep it up. But it’s not always easy and I have to remember to stay focused. 

Since November, I’ve been checking multiple times a day and understanding things that are going on. It’s holding me accountable. I’ll get more in-depth with this in a later post when I update the whole diabetes journey. 

Eating better

Easier said than done, right? 

Overall, I think I’ve done better with this over the past year or so. But that doesn’t mean it’s perfect. Though I’m a bit more cognizant about what I am eating, and the amount that I am eating, I still will be stupid. 

I’m going to say this, though. If all one is doing is eating healthy and not necessarily enjoying what they are eating, then it becomes harder. There are certain foods that are good for diabetics (certain veggies, for example) that I just don’t like. I can’t just eat them for the sake of it. So I have to work around this. The reality is also that food can be a wonderful thing – you just have to be smart how much you eat. Me eating a small piece of candy isn’t going to kill me. Me eating bags and handfuls of candy every day, on the other hand, probably would help speed the process along. 

Anyway, I’ve started being smarter with this again. I am trying to see what works and what doesn’t. Sure, I love bread, but I need to watch that. I can’t eat 5 rolls a day, for example. Smaller portions. Better choices. Watching the snacking. All the little things can add up to bigger things. 

I love me some food, too, so it can be hard. Alas, I will do what I can. 

So, portion control. Watching what I’m eating. And being smarter when it comes to snacking and things like that. I also plan on having a pen-and-paper notebook where I keep track of all things health – a one-stop shop spot. I can’t lie, though. So far this aspect isn’t working out well. 

Social media/news intake

This is fully aimed at the mental health side of things. 

This world that we live in right now is a fully connected one. People have their devices and social media and everything else. It’s crazy to think about a world without these things. I am glad, personally, that I grew up in an era when the biggest technology aspect we had was a Super Nintendo being released. We’re now in a world where .. you can live virtual lives or play video games that are as realistic as possible. It’s a world where news isn’t delivered by a newspaper, rather those 24-hour “news” channels that are actually more “entertainment” We are in a world where social media dominates and people feel free to say anything they want without worrying about repercussions. 

To avoid social media, you have to find ways to get away from it. Do something. Like this day trip to Legoland New York earlier this month!

Add all of this up and it can hammer your mental well being. 

Think about it. You can scroll a feed and see a photo of a dog doing something goofy. It’s cute, harmless, and makes you laugh. 

Go into the comments. They’ll range from people loving it to paragraphs on why this person is a crappy pet owner because they don’t have the dog in their lap 24 hours a day. Take a video of a husky refusing to come inside during a snowstorm. How many posts will be about that person sucking because “dogs should be inside with their people.” 

Give me a break. 

I never realized, though, how much reading crap like this can harm you and your own mental state. And it’s every single topic out there. It doesn’t matter as people have opinions, think they are the only opinion, and that’s it. End of story. 

Keep in mind that there’s a lot of good with social media, but equally a lot of bad. Make sure yours makes you happy and not angry, upset, or frustrated. I’m working on it myself and hope that it stays in check. 

Balance

Is this not one of the biggest things that many of us strike out on?

I think this is something I really haven’t had a good grasp on – having a certain balance in life. Let me explain. 

Harper is a great stress relief that helps with balance!

As I mentioned before, I find, at times, I’m just exhausted after work. And I shouldn’t necessarily be. So that means my after-work activities a lot of times are just kind of sitting around. This despite knowing there are a lot of other things I can be doing.

And none of those things have to necessarily be strenuous.

Playing with Harper. Going for a walk. Maybe working on a project. Putting a lego set together. Writing for my blog. Reorganizing areas of the house. So. Many. Things. 

Now, I’ve been working on this over the past couple months and am getting a little better. And with my blood sugar doing better, I do seem to have a little more energy (go figure). I’ve also been better about going to bed earlier. That’s helped as well. 

Balance also includes everything going on in the world, right? As mentioned earlier, reality is knowing our world is in a 24-hour news cycle and with so many polarizing people and topics, people are on edge quite often. I’m doing a lot better with my social media consumption; I avoid most non-stop news things; and I just try and get through life with a little less stress. There are a lot of other things for my TV time, for example, rather than non-stop current events. And I know the argument about not paying attention etc., but I just can’t live my life that way. If one worries too much, or gets caught in the hoopla too much, it takes a toll on you. 

Where am I at?

I’m better. 

That’s a blanket statement, but it’s the truth. Since I started watching everything with my physical health in November, I’ve found a lot more enjoyment in things around me. I’ve worked on a lot of changes

Here’s some things I’m working on: : 

  • I rarely go on Twitter. It’s a cesspool and unless it’s for work or somebody sends me a link of interest, I stay away. 
  • I have been working on locking down my Facebook account. That includes unfollowing, or in certain cases, “unfriending” people who are negative or add no value to my feed. My feed is full of Harper or things about my adventures etc. I use it as my “happy” social media and will do everything I can to keep it that way. 
  • I still love Instagram as it’s easy to avoid things that cause stress. 
  • I am doing my best, too, to stay out of comments for the majority of social media. If I do dive into them, I make sure to take it with a grain of salt and if I feel like they are annoying me, I go elsewhere.
  • I am working on being more regular with this blog. Even if it’s rarely read, it’s therapeutic. 
  • I have done much better with daily journaling, and I’m really trying to find the best way to be organized with planners and everything else.
  • I have and will continue to keep a much better eye on my diabetes. Sometimes my numbers go high and I am working to connect the dots. I understand insulin more and what I can do to work with it. 
  • I am walking and staying active as much as I can. I know they say the step count isn’t necessarily the biggest thing to being active, but I am trying to make sure I get at least 10,000 steps per day. For me, that’s a magic number that is good for me to aim for. 
  • Less screen time has been good, too. That doesn’t mean I don’t watch TV, but I am trying to not be on a computer as much with free time. Building LEGO sets, for example, has been helpful. I’m going to start maybe hitting up my XBox again more and whatever else I can do to enjoy things. When the weather turns, I have some woodworking projects I’d like to complete as well as house projects. 

Those are just a few of the things I’m working on. Everything is helping. I feel better. I have more energy (most of the time). I feel I am sleeping better and I’ve made sure the walks Harper and I go on are usually longer than in the past. 

And that balance I talked about earlier? Well, that helps with the mental aspect of things as well. Your mind can be challenged in other ways and not so overwhelmed with others. 

Life is a long road. Reality is, I’m more on the downhill side of life so things tend to move a bit faster. I don’t know how much time I have left. Hopefully quite a bit more. But I know I want it to be positive and good for myself, rather than full of stress. 

Be kind, folks. To yourself and to one another.

Feel free to leave a comment, or e-mail P.J. at hoohaablog@gmail.com. Also, please “Like” A ‘lil HooHaa on Facebook!

Adding an EDC to my life

People talk about their EDCs. You know – the everyday carry. 

I’ve often thought about an EDC myself, but I always wonder what to put in it. A lot of EDC things you see are a little more tactical in mind. While I do carry some things, they seem strewn about. I might have one thing here, and another thing in a different spot. 

In my quest to start trying to simplify life a bit to make life overall better in general, I’m thinking about an EDC “kit,” so to speak. My thought is to get a nice canvas messenger bag and then build accordingly. The idea would be to have this with me on most days, giving me the ability to adjust on the fly and also plan things out without getting too stressed out. 

See, my issue often is becoming overwhelmed. 

Be it personal or professional, things get piled on and I basically start to go into a freefall. That makes it hard to stay on task because I start to worry that the most current thing is the item that needs to be done right then and there. 

Some of the items I currently carry with me.

Basically, not setting boundaries. 

I try to keep organized through various calendars and such, but then – overwhelmed. I have a personal one, a work one … and I try to mix it. That’s all electronic. So I add things to this calendar or that one and then I start getting all panicked. 

The struggle is real. 

I’ve often hid or masked things when it comes to mini mental meltdowns. I often will stare into space and not know where I am going. I can’t keep focused and all of a sudden I’m way behind. My emotions and mind start to go all over the place and my temper can follow, though I usually keep that a little more guarded. 

When things like this happen, I also tend to not want to talk to anybody. It’s an evil cycle that never seems to have a true ending, rather I just find a way to crawl out of it. But once I do, I’m all over the place because of things that need to be done, both personal and professional. 

One thing it really interferes in is my ability to focus outside of work. I have a bunch of things I’d like to work on and get done. But I get so worn down at times from these feelings and such that I just become a potato at times. Thankfully, Harper makes sure I know I need to go out and walk. 

I realize this is all part of life. None of us likely have perfect, happy everyday feelings. We all struggle in certain areas, which makes us human. 

So back to the original topic – an EDC. How does that help?

Over the years, I’ve tried to plan things out a bit better. It doesn’t matter if it’s trying to utilize my Google calendars (which are good in a pinch), or the old-school pen-to-paper style. I truly do love pen to paper, but it’s also something you have to have a routine for. Just a regular old calendar book doesn’t usually work for me because I don’t use it enough. I need something a bit more substantial to try and help shape things a bit more. 

I’ve recently found a Clever Fox planner (on Amazon) and it has a lot to it. There are sections for goals, and planning, and all sorts of different things. It also has areas for reflection. I’m starting to think that would be important because it might get me to think more about what might trigger these mental blocks, as well as force me to prioritize things a bit more. 

The beginning will be hard as I’ll have to develop a routine. My hope would be that once that routine got going, I’d be more attentive to my life as a whole. 

I’d keep certain things I already use some (a smaller Hobonichi planner, which could be a spot for plans and ideas – I carry it often), and a small dateless planner I use for work notes and thoughts. They would each supplement the bigger one, which would encompass my whole life – so I could open it to the week and see priorities/goals and everything else outlined in front of me. 

I also hope it might help me start blogging more. 

Ok, I’m still blabbing. EDC. 

What would I carry in said EDC bag? What would I feel is something I’d want with me most of the time? 

  • EDC bag to hold everything
  • Main planner so I can access it, see an overview and be able to plan accordingly. 
  • Mini planner – which I will carry with me even when the bag isn’t with me
  • My iPad/keyboard (I want to start writing more on the fly when I can on personal time)
  • Small notebook
  • Pens/pencils/highlighters etc
  • Leatherman (or something like it) tool
  • Flashlight
  • Rulers (I tend to always have one or two small ones with me)
  • Water bottle
  • Headphones/earbuds
  • Possibly a phone charger

That’s my main thought process at this point. For those of you who have an EDC – what do you always have with you? What items do you think would be good in mine? The beauty of the one planner is it’s undated, so I can pick any month to start it. My birthday month (September) might be as good of a time as any to do it. 

Feel free to leave a comment, or e-mail P.J. at hoohaablog@gmail.com. Also, please “Like” A ‘lil HooHaa on Facebook!

The reality of life today

This year is a blur.

I mean, I’m sure most of us are happy that 2020 is already in its eighth month. And goodness knows we are all *hoping* 2021 will be better. 

It has to be, right?

The past five or six months have been a total blur. They’ve been some of the longest and toughest hours I’ve ever had professionally. Don’t get me wrong – I’m happy to have a job. I’ve been where millions of Americans currently are and I know how stressful and tough it can be. I feel for them and hope they’ll find work sooner rather than later. 

Stress since March comes in many different packages, though. 

For those on the front line (medical etc.), it’s been crazy. Having to deal with so much illness and death. For those who have had to work through this whole thing (raises hand), be it in a supermarket, or some other job considered essential. And those who were left in charge of trying to help their kids get through the end of the school year without messing up any sort of a learning process. Or having to find a way to do it and hold down a job. 

Then there’s the having to stay inside, or wear masks, or wash your hands more in a day then maybe you had in weeks before. Or hoping to find toilet paper (and other paper products) or hand sanitizer. 

I’m missing a lot here, I know. But if you think about the past 5-6 months, we’ve faced so many things. And that doesn’t even include the political or social justice side of things, which has put so many people on edge or ready to yell and scream at others. 

It’s all a blur. 

My head hurts from it all. I’ve been working in the office for a lot of this pandemic. Some days there was hardly anybody else in the building. Other times, a handful. Recently, there’s more. When I did work at home early on, it was hard. Concentration was very hard, and focus was tough. I came into the office because I could get things done. That, of course, added more though as I had this or that to help with. 

My body of professional work was actually kind of impressive. From ideas I had, to the executing of many massive projects, I am quite proud of things. 

But my mental health took a beating. And though I know depression and things like that are real, I’ve never really dealt with it. I still don’t think I have, but I definitely had some mental health battles over the past several months – and believe me, I know I’m not the only one. 

Flower photography has helped at times. Nature remains beautiful during a pandemic.

Though part of me in recent years has tended to be way more of an introvert, I still like some human contact outside of work. And doing Zoom meetups and things just don’t do it for me. Simple things weren’t possible, and that made it hard. I walked a bit more. I tried to be outside. I take a lot of photos of flowers and things like that. I listened to many podcasts. I played around online and dealt with virtual settings and games and things to try and up the entertainment value. I watched things on Netflix. 

It didn’t make it easier. 

It’s August now. 

I haven’t seen a baseball game in person this year, and I know I won’t. That’s hard for me. Baseball is a huge part of my summer, be it going by myself, with friends, or family. I love the ambiance and the sounds and the sights. I usually go on a baseball trip or three and those were canceled early in this, knowing we’d likely not be doing it. 

I had tentatively planned to work on a trip to Iceland in late September. That won’t happen. Though I’ve saved a bit more toward next September – hopefully. 

A couple of us had talked about maybe the UK in November or December to see Genesis on their reunion tour … they’ve postponed that until next year … so maybe. 

It’s still all a blur. 

You’d think I’d have blogged more with as much screen time as I’ve seemingly had. But the drive isn’t there. I stare and can’t get the words to flow. My eyes and head hurt. I am on a computer too much. Often, I’ll sit at night with my laptop on my lap and stare at the TV. Talk about a zombie at times. 

I’ve wanted to really start rolling creatively. I’ve worked on a bullet journal. Some pen pal items. Postcards. And I often stop and stare. I can’t get the creative juices flowing. I watch YouTube videos and surf groups and social media for inspiration. There’s a lot of talented people out there and I still can’t get the drive. 

I realize, too, I’m not the only one in this position. I’m lucky in that New York is one of the few states that has really improved with all of the COVID items. It’s kind of under control, to a point, and things are slowly allowing you to feel “somewhat” normal. No, you can’t do things you did before this or the same way. But we’re “under control” for a reason and we don’t need to screw that up. 

Other states are currently where New York was at the beginning of this. And that hurts everybody as it’s the warm months and people like to travel, even if they maybe shouldn’t. There’s no middle ground. 

So, we continue. 

I’m not sure if life will ever be normal again. The things we took heavily for granted might be things of the past. Businesses have closed and may never come back. Wearing a mask in some situations is almost becoming second nature. I’m curious how my job will be this fall as I expect I’ll be wearing masks more often and have no choice in it. That’s fine, too, I want us to be safe and smart so hopefully 2021 will be better than 2020. 

It’s incredible that it’s been so many months since this whole thing started. And yet, we’re not at the end yet. I once had a lot of optimism and hope. Now, I try and avoid the news and just hope eventually some positive news comes out with everything going on. 

The blur hasn’t changed, but I hope things eventually come back into focus.

Feel free to leave a comment, or e-mail P.J. at hoohaablog@gmail.com. Also, please “Like” A ‘lil HooHaa on Facebook! You can also follow me on Twitter @softball29!

It’s time to be good to one another

I’ll be the first to admit I’m not a fan of restrictions when it comes to doing what I want to do. And though the beginning of this seemed to be full of mixed feelings between full lock downs and overreactions, we know now that this is a serious situation we are in.

And while it might seem like the whole world doesn’t need to be on full lock down, the issue with not doing it everywhere is that those who are in areas that need it, might look to run to areas that don’t need it and … well, you get the idea of what could happen.

So the steps being taken now are very necessary and we all need to be smart and go along with this. 

I also think we weren’t ready for this and the fact that high-ranking officials didn’t necessarily take this seriously from the start also hurt. Alas, that’s not my point here. I don’t like to get too political on my blog, so I want to talk about a few more things on a broader spectrum. 

Local reach

As many of you know, I’m in New York. I’m not in the city or downstate, though. My county, as of me writing this, has supposedly 16-20 confirmed cases. Now, my county is also a large area with about 45,000 total people. So a lot of ground to cover. Though the population might not be as big as many other places, the size of the county is large.

The problem is, we have no idea where these cases in our county are as health services will not release the town names. 

Yes, you read that right. 

The county in which I reside will not release the towns the cases are in. As I noted, we are a vast county. So some people might get spooked a little more based on where people are. I’m not saying people shouldn’t be alarmed either way – they should – but it would be nice to know. They claim privacy etc. And they claim where people are located doesn’t matter. 

Yet, every other county seems to be releasing the towns. 

Our county leadership (outside of a few departments) is not the greatest. So this doesn’t surprise me. But the fact that they won’t even release the names of the towns is downright crazy. 

Every bit of news you hear is this town and that town. Not in this county. Allow people to know the truth so they can be a little more wary. 

The overall view of what is happening

I don’t think people, as a whole, are meant to be confined to their homes. They like to get out and see and do things. And with the spring months seemingly starting to really come along, people are going to get antsy. 

Still, we must be smart. 

This disease is moving rapidly. Though there appears to be good work being done on medicines and vaccines, it will still take time. 

I know I’m bummed because it’s baseball season. I love this time of the year. I should be getting amped up for seeing my first minor league game of the year next week. 

Not happening. 

At this rate, I will be happy if I get to see a dozen live games this summer. I’m hopeful. I truly am. But I also know the thought of thousands of people being put into close proximity isn’t going to be something officials are going to be rushing to do. I get that. 

What we should be thinking about is humanity as a whole. Yes, it’s inconvenient. Yes, it’s bothersome. Yes, it can be boring. Yes, the fact that businesses are shut down and people are out of work for now is awful. 

But all of this is far better than the likely alternative if we all just went around like nothing was going on. 

A few months from now when we are hopefully back to somewhat normal lives, we’ll look back on this with different thoughts. We need to do this for us, and for humanity as a whole. 

How to cope?

Things aren’t easy. 

I miss doing certain things and seeing certain people. I work in two schools and this is the time of year when things get amped up. Kids are usually looking forward to the end and all the exciting and outdoor activities would soon be underway. That’s changed.

Though I always washed hands and used hand sanitizer, I find myself doing it way more now. And I also find my hands are taking a beating from it. When I have gone to the store, I keep my space. When I go out for a walk, I keep my space. I tend to make sure I’m six feet the days I have to go into the office. 

Still, sanity isn’t a joke. I bet there will be a spike in depression medicines from this time. There are probably other things that will come out of this. It’s something we all are dealing with. 

But we have to try and keep some sanity. So what can you do? I’ve read many articles about this because, honestly, I wanted to make sure I took care of my health – physically and mentally – throughout this whole ordeal. Here are some of the best items I have found. If you have other ideas, drop them in the comments below!

  • Walk. If you aren’t mandated to stay inside because you are sick or fully quarantined, get outside. The air and sun can do wonders. Walking for 30-60 minutes can be a great way to clear your mind. Throw on some headphones and music or your favorite podcast and walk. Now, you should practice social distancing and be smart when outside, but it’s very good to get out. Make it solitary or with people in your immediate household. 
  • Visit a park. Many parks – statewide and national – are still open. Go visit. Hike. See some nature. Move through parking lots quickly, though, and if you see crowded areas, find another direction. 
  • Connect. Use FaceTime. Use Skype. Use some other sort of platform (Zoom seems to be popular)! Keep in touch with loved ones, especially those “vulnerable” who might be staying in a whole heap more. We have a lot of technology at our hands now – use it to keep sane. 
  • Play some games. If you have board games and have people in your immediate household, play some. There are a lot of great apps where you can connect with people to play with another person. Do some things where you can interact with people, even if online, so you can somewhat connect. (I’m on Word With Friends 2, and Boggle with Friends … I’m not always fast depending where I am, but I’m up for games. And suggestions for others!) 
  • For bloggers: Write and take photos. Use this time to get ahead. Write some things, take some photos, and try and make the most of this time to be creative. 
  • Take time to set personal goals. Look forward 3, 6, 9 months down the line when we hopefully will be back to normal. What kind of things do you want to get done? Start planning them out. 
  • Read a book. Listen to a podcast. There are SO many great books (and if you have E-readers, even more) and podcasts – there’s something for everybody. 
  • Binge some Netflix or something else. Hey. a day of binging a favorite show can let your mind rest and make you smile.

Here’s one thing from my end, and I’ve seen this written in several places. It’s OK to feel down or sad. It’s human emotion. But if you feel it’s bad, reach out for professional help. There are many tele-med ways of doing this, so seek the help if you feel yourself spiraling downward. We need to watch out for ourselves and loved ones. 

Reality is, we are in a situation many of us have never seen and, hopefully, will never see again.

But take care of yourself.

Wash your hands and use hand sanitizer!

Be smart and safe.

And most of all, keep smiling and be good to one another.

I know the climate with the world is tense and unnerving. I’ve done my best to distance myself from too many political talks or watching daily updates on TV, especially because we aren’t going to get along with opinions right now.

The one thing we can control is how we treat one another. Be good to others and we’ll find a way to get through this.

Feel free to leave a comment, or e-mail P.J. at hoohaablog@gmail.com. Also, please “Like” A ‘lil HooHaa on Facebook! You can also follow me on Twitter @softball29!