For the record, this post is one I started writing a few months ago. I need to update as I go through this and get it current, but a lot of this is still highly valid. And it’s something I had worked on, so I wanted to make sure it was published.
When I started this, I was still about a month out from my most recent doctor’s appointment. I knew my blood work wasn’t going to be the best, but I was working to make sure it was better. My appointment got canceled, and I rescheduled for soon after (got lucky there). And I might tackle some of that here, but I have a more in-depth post being worked on for that.
The reality is I truly think I hit rock bottom with the blood sugars. And though I have thought that before, this time I truly think I bottomed out. And, in the end, hopefully that’s a good thing. All of this is on me. I have often said that I know I need to do A and B, but then I end up just doing C and D.
And that’s not good. It’s time to change things up.
Looking at the big picture
It’s understandable that people’s mental health may not be what they want to be. And while I try not to get political with my posts – I want to talk about something in a broad sense. The political spectrum since around 2015 has been crazy – on both sides. Candidates are more polarizing, more in your face and, depending on which party you are part of, see the other side as scary. It doesn’t matter who you support – the other side no longer says “hey let’s chat,” instead it’s “evil.”
Social media and the 24-hour news media cycle plays a healthy part in that.
And, again, I don’t care which side you support – this is true on both sides. There’s an “extreme” version on both sides, and there’s a more middle to each side. But the “wings” tend to be louder and push things more.
Social media, again, is a huge part of that.
So what happens with all of this? Stress builds up. Worry builds up. Anxiety builds up. You see people in a different light than you once did. People end decades-long friendships; family members fight one another; neighbors look at one another differently; towns, cities, states, and countries divide; and there’s no longer a sense of … doing what’s right for the people.
The reality is – we can’t control a lot of these things. The only thing we can do is work on ourselves and try to survive living in this world the best we can.
If you think it’s just politics, though, you’re crazy.
As much as we may want to blame presidents or those in congress for certain things – they really don’t control a lot of things, such as gas prices. The corporate world is fully behind prices and everything else. Otherwise try and explain to me why gas in my area is about 3.39 per gallon. Go an hour away – and not off a major highway – and you can get it for 2.85 (ish). Go 10 minutes down the road from my town and it’s 3.25ish, or on Sundays, it’s less than $3..
That has nothing to do with where the delivery is coming from.
Again, we can only control so much. The biggest thing we can control is ourselves and protect our own mental and physical health the best we can.
I can say I haven’t done the best with that, but hopefully that can change.
So, what’s going on?
First, my blood sugars aren’t the best. My A1C from two times ago went down a tick, and then this last time in December took a noticeable and good drop. It’s still not where it should be. But it’s getting there. I am focusing a lot more on all aspects of health for myself and results have been good so far.
Physically, I’ve maintained about the same weight as I’ve been for a bit, and it’s actually gone down a little. However, there’s definitely some inches coming off. Over about a 3-4 month span in 2024, I had put a little back on and I had been getting a little lazy about things. I was still stress snacking. I tried to limit it, but at times, it was hard. Since November, I’ve gotten immensely better with it.
But, reality, the daily grind can tire you out. I don’t always push myself with walks with Harper etc. I need to do more of that and get out with her and explore more. Sometimes, weekends are just sloth-like times where I get a walk or so in and then just kind of veg. While I do believe those types of days are needed at times – especially for your mental side – it’s also not good to always have them.
I have changed that a bit since 2025 started and I notice that I feel better.
On the mental health side of things, I was stretched pretty thin toward the end of 2024.
I was exhausted mentally most of the time and was burning the candle at both ends when it came to work. I’m sure, like many people, the expectations surrounding what I do are often higher than they should be (pay grade!), and not sustainable. The balance there is very tough and I’m always trying to find a way to do so while still maintaining the level I have always strived to have. Sometimes it’s hard in my job, too, as you have multiple bosses, but also ones you don’t always see or hear from. Sometimes those lines of communication are tougher and you feel like you’re out on an island when it comes to certain things.
I’m still new to exploring my own mental health and trying to understand what helps and what doesn’t. When you take everything into account – finances, health, personal growth, relationships of all types, professional life, and everything else – it’s so much for the human mind to absorb. You add in the constant flow of social media, media, and other screen time things, and it’s overwhelming.
Heavily overwhelming.
I often feel like I am in a bubble of sorts and you can’t get out. I often see things and it’s almost like a blank stare. I sometimes pass people when I walk and don’t even realize they are there. I miss a lot of the little things and that’s tough, too. I often pass by neighbors or others and I’m just in a daze, barely acknowledging somebody.
I could be fully wrong, but that just seems like a sign of being overwhelmed with life.
Is that any way to live?
What to do?
I’ve been trying to grasp things over the past few months. The reality is that I’m now 51 and some things aren’t as easy as they once were. At the same time, I also don’t want to cut out things I enjoy, so moderation is going to be key.
I have a bit of a plan I hope to follow and we’ll see if it works. Here’s a bit of a glimpse of what I hope to do.
Blood monitoring
Honestly, until mid-November, I had been fully shitty about this.. When I got up in the morning, I always forgot to check my blood before my walk. Then it doesn’t hit me that I didn’t until I’m midway through breakfast. Then I lose my head and just forget. I know one thing that needs to be done is get back into the routine of things.
I also know that there are the ones that can be worn and are continuous. I’ve tried those before. They don’t work well for me because I end up bumping into something or forgetting it’s on and when I get out of the shower go over it too hard and they fall out. And once they are out, it’s done. I do have a sample one that I’d like to try soon and see if I can do it better, but I know how I am!
Anyway, I have multiple of the readers I use. It’s nice because it connects to my phone and to an app I really like – MySugr. And as long as I use this brand, I get the VIP part of the app free. I purchased a second lancet device, which allows me to keep one reader upstairs as a reminder to check. My hope is that it will remind me to check at a couple of important times – the morning and at night before bed (so far, so good). The other I will carry with me during the day and check at different times. If I start doing this more, hopefully I can see any trends or anything like that to help.
I can’t stress enough that this is one of the most important things I need to start doing again. While eating smart and exercising is huge, this is the aspect that will allow me to see how my blood sugar reacts to certain things. I won’t know if things go up or down if I am not watching this. So far, so good. I’ve been doing well with it and will hopefully keep it up. But it’s not always easy and I have to remember to stay focused.
Since November, I’ve been checking multiple times a day and understanding things that are going on. It’s holding me accountable. I’ll get more in-depth with this in a later post when I update the whole diabetes journey.
Eating better
Easier said than done, right?
Overall, I think I’ve done better with this over the past year or so. But that doesn’t mean it’s perfect. Though I’m a bit more cognizant about what I am eating, and the amount that I am eating, I still will be stupid.
I’m going to say this, though. If all one is doing is eating healthy and not necessarily enjoying what they are eating, then it becomes harder. There are certain foods that are good for diabetics (certain veggies, for example) that I just don’t like. I can’t just eat them for the sake of it. So I have to work around this. The reality is also that food can be a wonderful thing – you just have to be smart how much you eat. Me eating a small piece of candy isn’t going to kill me. Me eating bags and handfuls of candy every day, on the other hand, probably would help speed the process along.
Anyway, I’ve started being smarter with this again. I am trying to see what works and what doesn’t. Sure, I love bread, but I need to watch that. I can’t eat 5 rolls a day, for example. Smaller portions. Better choices. Watching the snacking. All the little things can add up to bigger things.
I love me some food, too, so it can be hard. Alas, I will do what I can.
So, portion control. Watching what I’m eating. And being smarter when it comes to snacking and things like that. I also plan on having a pen-and-paper notebook where I keep track of all things health – a one-stop shop spot. I can’t lie, though. So far this aspect isn’t working out well.
Social media/news intake
This is fully aimed at the mental health side of things.
This world that we live in right now is a fully connected one. People have their devices and social media and everything else. It’s crazy to think about a world without these things. I am glad, personally, that I grew up in an era when the biggest technology aspect we had was a Super Nintendo being released. We’re now in a world where .. you can live virtual lives or play video games that are as realistic as possible. It’s a world where news isn’t delivered by a newspaper, rather those 24-hour “news” channels that are actually more “entertainment” We are in a world where social media dominates and people feel free to say anything they want without worrying about repercussions.
Add all of this up and it can hammer your mental well being.
Think about it. You can scroll a feed and see a photo of a dog doing something goofy. It’s cute, harmless, and makes you laugh.
Go into the comments. They’ll range from people loving it to paragraphs on why this person is a crappy pet owner because they don’t have the dog in their lap 24 hours a day. Take a video of a husky refusing to come inside during a snowstorm. How many posts will be about that person sucking because “dogs should be inside with their people.”
Give me a break.
I never realized, though, how much reading crap like this can harm you and your own mental state. And it’s every single topic out there. It doesn’t matter as people have opinions, think they are the only opinion, and that’s it. End of story.
Keep in mind that there’s a lot of good with social media, but equally a lot of bad. Make sure yours makes you happy and not angry, upset, or frustrated. I’m working on it myself and hope that it stays in check.
Balance
Is this not one of the biggest things that many of us strike out on?
I think this is something I really haven’t had a good grasp on – having a certain balance in life. Let me explain.
As I mentioned before, I find, at times, I’m just exhausted after work. And I shouldn’t necessarily be. So that means my after-work activities a lot of times are just kind of sitting around. This despite knowing there are a lot of other things I can be doing.
And none of those things have to necessarily be strenuous.
Playing with Harper. Going for a walk. Maybe working on a project. Putting a lego set together. Writing for my blog. Reorganizing areas of the house. So. Many. Things.
Now, I’ve been working on this over the past couple months and am getting a little better. And with my blood sugar doing better, I do seem to have a little more energy (go figure). I’ve also been better about going to bed earlier. That’s helped as well.
Balance also includes everything going on in the world, right? As mentioned earlier, reality is knowing our world is in a 24-hour news cycle and with so many polarizing people and topics, people are on edge quite often. I’m doing a lot better with my social media consumption; I avoid most non-stop news things; and I just try and get through life with a little less stress. There are a lot of other things for my TV time, for example, rather than non-stop current events. And I know the argument about not paying attention etc., but I just can’t live my life that way. If one worries too much, or gets caught in the hoopla too much, it takes a toll on you.
Where am I at?
I’m better.
That’s a blanket statement, but it’s the truth. Since I started watching everything with my physical health in November, I’ve found a lot more enjoyment in things around me. I’ve worked on a lot of changes
Here’s some things I’m working on: :
- I rarely go on Twitter. It’s a cesspool and unless it’s for work or somebody sends me a link of interest, I stay away.
- I have been working on locking down my Facebook account. That includes unfollowing, or in certain cases, “unfriending” people who are negative or add no value to my feed. My feed is full of Harper or things about my adventures etc. I use it as my “happy” social media and will do everything I can to keep it that way.
- I still love Instagram as it’s easy to avoid things that cause stress.
- I am doing my best, too, to stay out of comments for the majority of social media. If I do dive into them, I make sure to take it with a grain of salt and if I feel like they are annoying me, I go elsewhere.
- I am working on being more regular with this blog. Even if it’s rarely read, it’s therapeutic.
- I have done much better with daily journaling, and I’m really trying to find the best way to be organized with planners and everything else.
- I have and will continue to keep a much better eye on my diabetes. Sometimes my numbers go high and I am working to connect the dots. I understand insulin more and what I can do to work with it.
- I am walking and staying active as much as I can. I know they say the step count isn’t necessarily the biggest thing to being active, but I am trying to make sure I get at least 10,000 steps per day. For me, that’s a magic number that is good for me to aim for.
- Less screen time has been good, too. That doesn’t mean I don’t watch TV, but I am trying to not be on a computer as much with free time. Building LEGO sets, for example, has been helpful. I’m going to start maybe hitting up my XBox again more and whatever else I can do to enjoy things. When the weather turns, I have some woodworking projects I’d like to complete as well as house projects.
Those are just a few of the things I’m working on. Everything is helping. I feel better. I have more energy (most of the time). I feel I am sleeping better and I’ve made sure the walks Harper and I go on are usually longer than in the past.
And that balance I talked about earlier? Well, that helps with the mental aspect of things as well. Your mind can be challenged in other ways and not so overwhelmed with others.
Life is a long road. Reality is, I’m more on the downhill side of life so things tend to move a bit faster. I don’t know how much time I have left. Hopefully quite a bit more. But I know I want it to be positive and good for myself, rather than full of stress.
Be kind, folks. To yourself and to one another.
Feel free to leave a comment, or e-mail P.J. at hoohaablog@gmail.com. Also, please “Like” A ‘lil HooHaa on Facebook!
